Tag Archives: "birthmother "term controversy

NOTE TO AL NEUHARTH: CASEY ANTHONY IS NOT A "BIRTH MOTHER" OR WHY LANGUAGE COUNTS

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NOTE: I’m not here to argue which de jour term is appropriate, but to discuss how the misuse of language in a recent op-ed piece in USA Today can negatively affect public perception. ****** Al Neuharth posted a really annoying blog in Friday’s USA Today. (The media mogul is founder of the paper). In Little Caylee’s legacy: No child unwanted, Neuharth argues that the Caylee Anthony case “should help us focus on two prime human problems in our society: unwanted children by women who get pregnant by mistake wanted children by women who can’t get pregnant Unless some new evidence develops, it’s apparent that Casey Anthony was a lousy mother. At best she’s stupid or crazy. At worst, evil. The press has widely reported that she wanted to put Caylee up for adoption and was pressured by her mother, Cindy Anthony, to keep her. For the record I believe that motherhood should be consensual and no woman should be forced, coerced, or pressured to either carry to term or to keep or not keep a child after it is born. The decision should be her responsibility and hers alone. What annoyed me about Neharth’s piece was not so much the Continue Reading →

OH, MY! OH, MY! IT’S APPLE PIE: MOTHER’S DAY!

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Once more, we in AdoptionLand are accosted by Mother’s Day. What does it mean? Who is it about? Bastardette even wonders: why bother?–but then she’s mean-spirited and hateful. And since she is not a mother of any sort (praise be to Kali!) she does not feel qualified to discuss the qualities of motherhood in general. The term “mother” and all of its associated emotions, however, is a flashpoint in adoption. Just what and who is a mother? What is the correct terminology for women who gave birth and, willing or unwilling, “relinquish” their children for adoption. Birthmother? Natural mother? First mother? Biological mother? Real mother? Mother? And for women who have adopted the children of these women, what is the correct term? Adoptive mother? Adopter? Real mother? Or the ever-grating “adoptress? which almost rhymes with adultress. For what it’s worth, nobody ever hardly asks adopted people what they think about this schezoid naming ritual, which is probably for the best. Many birthmothers (and I’m using that term strictly as a generic accepted term within the adoption industry) feel disenfranchised by Mother’s Day. Thus, a few years ago a new “holiday” was created just for them: “Birthmother’s Day complete with special Continue Reading →