Well, that’s not what Abby calls him, but what else could he be? Son given up for adoption threatens marriage It figures he’s from New Jersey DEAR ABBY: I became an unwed mother many years ago, when there was a stigma attached to having an illegitimate child. Unable to care for my son, I placed him for adoption. He has now found me. I have a family, and my husband does not want me to tell our adult children or contact the young man and his family. Do I go against the wishes of my husband, whom I love very much, or should I tell our children and perhaps risk my husband leaving me? – CONFLICTED IN NEW JERSEY What about “Husband threatens marriage”? Empty this douchebag down the drain right now. Followed by scalding water. Followed by 20 minutes of garbage disposing. Thanks to Jo Anne Swanson